Living With A Wife With Borderline Personality Disorder
The last time we met he had carved his boyfriend’s name on his chest. I would say I dodged a bullet but if anything i’m still recovering from the wound. I’m a bit confused here since most of these interactions start of purely based on physical attraction . Hey Rick, wondering if you’d have some advice for me.
Listen to understand
She had been a cutter, and suffered from bouts of anorexia. Still, a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder doesn’t need to be the death knell for all relationships — present or future. When I stopped doing that they disappeared. When they called I tried change subject to let’s go do something today instead of trying fix them. The craziness I saw in these women I don’t know how any guy would endure it.
Dangers of intense “neediness” in romantic or close relationships.
He made no real effort to fight for me or us and just said he knew he was rotten to the core and I deserve better. I don’t think people with BPD are essentially bad, selfish but not bad. But I’ve so much sympathy for anyone in any sort of relationship copsasity withthrm. If you’re living with Borderline Personality Disorder , you know how challenging it can be to manage your emotions and build stable, healthy relationships. BetterHelp offers convenient, affordable, and confidential online therapy that can help you take control of your BPD symptoms and achieve a more fulfilling life.
As I look back, I realize that she may do the same thing to me, and throw me out like garbage when someone else comes along. Things have been slowly eroding over the past 8 months, the cutting, the suicide attempts, manipulation, and blame. My current girlfriend did not attend the funeral simply because she never met my Mom. I still haven’t heard the end of that. I was beside myself, and the maintenance guy who saw the whole incident immediately called 911.
After two days of swollen eyes from crying so much I’ve come to realize that it’s not me it’s the damn disease. I hate what it does to the person that suffers from it and I hate what it does to the person that loves them through it. Everything was just thrown away like it meant nothing at all. And while they continue in their next quest for fulfillment it leaves us empty and broken-hearted. I’m a strong woman and I’ll get through this but it hurts like hell right now. Because I gave everything and did everything to ensure her happiness and well being.
The BPD parent may be reduced to supervised contact only and/or no contact without the approval of the other parent. Connecting with experts, ranging from therapists to forensic evaluators, can be beneficial. These professionals may help you come up with realistic solutions for co-parenting peacefully. In many cases, you should try to schedule interactions with a co-parenting partner to occur in public. A neutral, public setting allows for potential conflict to be observed and witnessed, preventing incidents from happening or mistruths from being told.
Ultimately, you should date someone who accepts you for who you are, flaws and all. The only way you can achieve this is by having no shame about who you are and not being afraid to reveal that. Don’t even worry about BPD at your age. Women at that age have a lot of emotions in general, their bodies are changing and they’re getting men from all over the internet wanting to fuck them. Your best bet is to let her have her space.
It seems the only way to not be destroyed is to roll with the punches, kicks, etc….but never let them knock you down. No need to warn https://onlinedatingcritic.com/ the next person either. That might give away your power of knowledge about them. And they’ll use it as ammo to blast your arms off.
Since that time I broke up any contact with her and moved on by taking care of my own needs and wishes. Exactly, dating a BPD is all about 1) changing your mindsets. 2) realizing that you cannot control your partner. 4) develop your self-respect, self-worth, self-love.
Because of this upbringing, I ended up becoming desperately obsessed with intimacy. So when I got a girlfriend, I wanted to do nothing but touch her all day. This is classic codependency and extremely unattractive. You end up spending all your time and effort trying to please your partner INSTEAD OF focusing on yourself and improving your life.
I was dealing with someone for 5 months who had bpd and warned me actually and the understanding/open type of person I am, thought I could withstand it. When we first started dating everything felt to good to be true. She told me I was everything she could ever imagine.
I supported her because it was ultimately her decision. Several days after that, she asked that we take a break. I understood because I knew she had been through a lot. The past 2 months I had been in contact with her and she kept saying she needed more time.
She learned to bury her issues in her work , attained PhD and had a great career. After a number of years of marriage, things got stressful at work and she started having anxiety about aging when she was close to 50. She went through a midlife crisis, but as I discovered, really became who she already was. She did a lot of crazy things and I am now trying to finish a divorce without setting her off again for the sake of my kids. She started the process five years ago.